Sometimes on Saturday, after an early morning pee-pee expedition that forces our mother to take us outside at 5 AM, we like to contemplate how lucky we are to have someone like her, who is willing to stand in the pitch black wearing her bath robe, waiting for us to do our business.
Yours In Gratitude,
815. How painful the shin massage can be when you’re getting a pedicure
816. How the ice bucket challenge can be so gosh darn har-har successful but we can’t figure out a way for black men and boys to stop getting shot for no reason
817. The official pronunciation of “salad nicoise”
Choose the peaceful path.
Sometimes on Saturday, after we’ve taken our early morning walk and participated in an afternoon lounge with our mother, we become unexpectedly on high alert when our parents announce that the garage door opener stops working creating a questionable situation when it comes to our food stash. Will we ever be able to eat again? we wonder to ourselves. But it turns out that there is nothing to poopie in our pants about because our concerned parents turn into detectives and talented garage door openers, thereby ensuring that we will be fed forever.
Can I Get a Hallelujah?
Glen of the Grateful
In this pivotal scene, the actress takes a breather from having a nervous breakdown and simply contemplates why everyone wants her to dance so fast.