Sometimes on Saturday, after an unexpected Mother vs Moth battle that ends with our Mother being victorious, we like to have a special Valentine’s Day stare-a-thon, in order to convey to her that we couldn’t, wouldn’t shouldn’t ever have to live without her.
Sometimes on Saturday, after we’ve witnessed our father watch 72 hours of non-stop Super Bowl coverage, we like to showcase some football skills of our own, impressing our parents with the speed and agility we exhibit when we catch and hurl Sharkey fifty feet into the goddamn air.
Tom Brady Who?,
Gary Go Long
Sometimes on Saturday, after a wild morning trot in the rain followed by a frenzied gallop around the living room while our towel-wielding mother tries to catch us, we like take the train to Cozyville and fold ourselves into our favorite blanket as if we were the contents of a burrito.
Sometimes on Saturday, after our parents participate in an early morning to mid-afternoon do nothing time due to the hectic schedule they kept over Christmas, we like to perk up their spirits by putting on a small scale production we like to call The Birth Of Jesus, with us in a starring role as whats-his-face, one of the Three Wise Men, knowing that when they see our dramatic acting abilities they will be motivated to get off their lazy, boring asses.
Yours In Myrrh,
Dave Do Something
Sometimes on Saturday, after a perfect morning filled with an exhilarating morning walk followed up with a kick-ass breakfast made up of our favorite kibble and roast turkey, we like to get our cra-za-zy on and hurl ourselves into the cozy blankets that bring us so much joy, all the while saying to our Mom and Dad, Thank You Thank You Thank You for making us so deliriously happy.
Yours In Slobberey Gratitude,
Cooper of the Quite Content