All posts in Things I Like More Than…

Things I Like More Than Having a Bernie Supporter Tell Me That Bernie Is Going To Be President Because He Was “Sent From On High”

1. Bunions
2. Fruit flies
3. Having something go down the wrong pipe while dining at an intimate restaurant
4. Getting stuck in an elevator
5. Losing my luggage

Things I Like More Than Having a Stranger Try To Sell Me On the Paleo Diet While I’m Purchasing My Beloved Mint Milano Cookies

1. Cow dung smoothies
2. Having my tires slashed
3. Toenail fungus
4. Being falsely imprisoned
5. Getting gored by a bull

Things I Like More Than Anti-Vaxxers

1. Pulp the size of tree limbs in my orange juice
2. Duct tape over my eyes
3. Body surfing in a tsunami
4. Skunk filled egg rolls
5. Being forced to treat the Housewives of New Jersey in hairspray addiction

Things I Like More Than FOX News

1. Trying to outrun a vicious cheetah
2. A bad case of shingles
3. Getting rear ended by an uninsured driver
4. Scurvy Dog Pot Pie
5. Thumbtacks up my nostrils

Things I Like More Than Hobby Lobby

1. Mulch up my butt
2. Being the goalie for Brazil in the game against Germany
3. Knitting needles plunged into my pupils every morning
4. Parachuting with an “antique” parachute
5. Nails in my eardrums