I’m not Scotland Yard or anything but let me just say that I saw you when your gigantic great dane took a poop the size of the space shuttle on our neighbor’s yard and you chose to not pick it up. True, you would have needed a dump truck to assist you in cleaning up the mess your NBA sized dog left but the point is that you immediately left the scene of the crime thinking that you were escaping without one sniff, without one pair of eyeballs witnessing. But you would have been wrong because I saw you there, scurrying away from the four foot pile of doodoo and make no mistake this will be the first thing I think of when I bump into you on the street as I take a walk with my dwarfish terrier-beagle mix as we’re on our way to do his business with our trusty plastic bag.
Do The Right Thing For Chriminy Sake,
Helena the Hall Monitor