Things I Don’t Understand, Items 566 thru 568

566. Why those guys in One Direction keep telling me I don’t know how beautiful I am
567. That blood curdling terror thing that happens when you’re in a public restroom and you are positive you’ve locked the door and someone on the outside lookin’ to come in starts jiggling the door handle and you’re all “OH MY LORD DEAR GOD NO!!!!!”
568. Tattoos that have bad grammar

4 Comments on "Things I Don’t Understand, Items 566 thru 568"

  1. I recall sitting on a public toilet listening to footsteps getting closer then watching the door swing open. Mercifully, I was drunk and didn’t mind much.

  2. I wonder how that guy the the Romney logo on the side of his face feels this morning?

  3. PJ says:

    #568 Tattoos does with inferior ink infuriate me. Please. Have respect for color.

  4. The Zadge says:

    #566: The skinny jeans and the white sneakers. There ain’t enough boy-bandness to make that cool.