To-Do List: Anthony Weiner’s Weiner

Hi. I’m Anthony Weiner’s weiner and here is my To-Do List:

1. Wake up feeling slouchy—wonder why Anthony always makes us stand up straight.
2. Confirm makeover appointment at Nordstorm. Need to find the right shade of foundation!
3. Attend “How To Smile On Command and Under Pressure” workshop in the alley behind house.
4. Nap for half an hour with cucumber slice on eye to reduce dark circles. Maybe find a low brimmed hat?
5. Finish second draft of memoir, Handsome Like Me.

4 Comments on "To-Do List: Anthony Weiner’s Weiner"

  1. claudia w says:

    Oh my…

  2. Alex says:

    #4 has got me in stitches…a low brimmed hat! I’ll never be able to un-picture that.

  3. PJ says:

    #6 Memorize joke about what is the difference between me and a flag pole. Was it something about saluting?

  4. The Zadge says:

    This week’s New Yorker cover. Best. Ever.