Tuesday Expert Advice

Dear Cupcake,

One of the main headlines on MSN this evening heralded an important event involving Beyonce and Natalie Portman. The breaking news article, titled VOTE ON HAIR STYLE , showed photos of Beyonce with short hair and Beyonce with long hair and then Natalie Portman with short hair and Natalie Portman with long hair and I was wondering—do you know if this particular Hairdo Election is in need of phone banking volunteers and precinct walkers OR should I just complete my mail-in ballot and expect to hear Beyonce’s inevitable acceptance on election night because she wins everything?
—Hoping My Chad Isn’t Hanging In Hattiesburg

Dear Hanging,
Good luck,

13 Comments on "Tuesday Expert Advice"

  1. JaniceP says:

    The really, really important election is happening over on People – what should Jennifer Anniston wear for a wedding dress?

    Signed…. sigh…why do I keep reading this crap?

  2. Cupcake Murphy Cupcake Murphy says:

    I saw that! I AM CONCERNED MY VOTE WON’T COUNT. I think she should wear overalls.

  3. claudia w says:

    I am still affected by #1 from yesterday! (shudders)

  4. Catalyst says:

    Jennifer in overalls – Ohhh, yeahhhhh! (shivering)

  5. The Farmer says:

    And then there’s Miley

  6. Cupcake Murphy says:

    Breaking news.

  7. The Zadge says:

    I wonder if Kanye will jump on stage if Natalie pulls out an upset.

  8. Dear Hattiesburg:

    Please send your (large) donation to my new Super PAC called Rock the Follicles. We care deeply about our dear celebrities’ hairstyles and we will make sure your dollars are put toward meaningful, all-American advertisements to convince our famous ones NOT to let their hair look like shit. Because that’s embarrassing for all of us.

    President, Rock the Follicles

    • Cupcake Murphy Cupcake Murphy says:

      It’s possible I’ve mentioned this before but one time I saw an actual real life interview with Salma Hayek and she said she was feeling blue because she had not had time to do her hair properly before meeting the interviewer and this made her sad because she knew it let her fans down. When her hair was not at its best. She actually said that. Swear.

  9. Howling robin says:

    Frida was spinning in her grave.